Flat Tire Did Not Ply Deflating Psi Lance

True add verse situation,

whereat me mission

trans send dint state didst ache

after yours truly nearly

did nearly break

chassis 'pon took drastic

over corrective measure,

not quite August,

nor jejune piece of cake,

while rounding raised

curbed contra corner

suddenly felt wrath of wife quake,

viz passenger rear tire

gone flat as a pancake

impresario found myself

hearing Thus Spake,

Zarathustra, when in truth...

twas ma constricted trach.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Some weeks back

acting so cool and chic - bank

king all bravado, machismo

self importance, and frank

lee babbling like a cripple creek

off by a black key with Hank

Williams tune imagining

myself swaggering like a lank

key trump petting Don

(feigning faw being "Beefy") plank

walking lampoon able

laughingstock Freaky, thank

less as a lapsed worn eraser head

pencil necked Geek yank

key doodle dandy hood be

forced to do penance as cap

pit dull leotarded asinine

arthouse flop, where nary any words

(worth their weight in gold)

described my benign

behavior, NOT even

smattering of unflattering deign

nig grating hammock colorful expletives,

that would find an ensign

sailor to blush at my inept

shameless travesty over the line

utter in apropos totally tubularly

moronic juvenile mine

ness zero car raze zee antics,

didst drive my doppelganger nine

tee bajillion miles away in search

of another auto body – pine

ning for newer model

then a 2009 Hyundai Sonata sign

ning off contract with this

stunt driver wannabe

unimpressively try'n

to act the blithe dare devil,

while thee spouse didst wine

and scream more'n bloody Mary

as the gunned axle nearly broke

trying my damn nest to

"FAKE" dagger a type cloak

his husband resembled a fool,

where angels fear to tread didst evoke

unsuccessful, unstinting, and unsparing

unstrung epithets of colorful expletives

unsuitable for poetic folk

boot urgent prayer went out

to incredible Hulk

Hogan, and/or even the ghost

of Andre The Giant, this haint no joke!