Catching Fireflies

I like to look at the world from afar
watch the nature, follow the stars.
But,
It's so hard-
to catch fireflies in a jar,
when all the lights are out
and you don't know who you are.
Growing up you're expected
to know how to catch your firefly.
You're told
if you don't, you'll ruin your life.
You're told
if you don't, you'll miserably die.
But,
It's so hard-
to catch fireflies at night,
when they meet your personality
and don't want to shine their light.
Catching something you simply can't see.
Catching something that doesn't want to be seen.
At least not by you;
feels like an impossibility.
The world has expectations for you,
and when you slip,
everyone is watching.
They will hurt you.
They will deceive you.
They will insult you.
They will push you down until you can take nothing more than a gun to the head.
But,
It's so hard-
when as much as you may say it,
you really don't want to be dead.
You want to be happy and live fully,
but not in such dread.
You can't catch the fireflies because these aren't the fireflies you want to catch.
You can't catch the fireflies because deep down inside,
You don't fit what the world expects.
It's not the fireflies that are turning off their lights to you,
it's not the fireflies that are disregarding you,
not accepting you;
it's your personality,
that's not accepting them.
You're turning your light off at them.
You don't want to catch them.
These aren't what you want.
These are the fireflies-
that they say you should want.
That the outer world expects you to want.
But,
It's so hard-
to stray from what the world expects.
To make your own choice,
despite their disregard.
It so hard,
to stick to your own personality-
to who you are.
It's so difficult to stand strong,
but it's even more difficult to give in,
to give up.
Hold your breath through the bad days.
There will be so many.
Because,
It isn't hard-
To catch the fireflies that you want to catch.
To live a life,
you want to live.
To make the choices-
you
want 
to
make.

A note:

We can't ignore our problems,
but we can recognize the people that we love,
the ones that love us,
and we can get our problems out with them.
Find out who these people are,
Because they are the ones
who will be there right with you.
Because they are the ones-
Staying by your side,
helping you find-

the right firefly.

It takes allot making the first step,
But afterward-
why, that's not hard at all.

-An original about future careers,
being who you want to be,
goals, close friends,
and the harsh expectations- 
of the real world.
           
   A poem by
           Aems (9-13-18),