A.H. Browning

Alive


Night fades and the world stirs, so gradually awakening

I embark as moon and stars are poised to sleep
All things of past and present, converge surreally in this moment
My urgent purpose to be near you compels me out into the cold


The sun rises majestically, with glowing warmth and radiant purpose
The earth responds with swelling symphonies of life
I pause to look with clouded vision; I fight to stifle smoldering unease
Amid life’s spectacle, my thoughts are laden with haunting doubt


Adversity watches… prowling, lurking amid the shadows
Leering, waiting, scheming, taking
Westward, stygian clouds gather, abysmally, foreboding
With menacing and frightful reveal


Light descends in ebbing radiance, beguiling, unearthly
Through weathered branches and falling softly upon the ground
Illuminating perceptions and glimmering, dreamily
On the apprehensions I incessantly bleed


Wakeful nights impede my passage, a torment unabating
The day finds me despondent, imprisoned
Shackled to outcomes both fortuitous and devised
I rue fate’s most callous resolve


I find you here waiting with hollow embrace
Your silence cuts painfully deep
The flowers I carry have no promise to offer
There’s no pleasure or solace in our tryst


I see dimly and fleeting, the shadows of our dreams
Cast obscurely around the marker on your grave
I exist here, disconsolate, while so many long gone
Lie silent and resting in their tombs


Malefic ravens attend me with pitiless reception
To callously extinguish the light in my heart
Why did I choose expectation and hope
What promise is there in such fragile endeavors


This flesh, these bones, they fetter my soul
And bind me inescapably to this moment in time
My prison grows stronger with each breath that I take
Life’s curse is to continue, without you


I can’t help but recall the fervent light in your eyes
The unshakable hope in your voice
My days are long in your absence, the nights, eternal
I endure to bear witness to the wonder of your love


I am alive
And though departed
You live
In me

Copyright © 2018 Twenty Seventeen, LLC

http://ahbrowning.com/

Comments1

  • orchidee

    A fine write A.H. I agree in that we hold memories, thoughts, etc of departed loved ones, but not with any 'spookiness' or 'weirdness!'

    • A.H. Browning

      Thank you for reading and commenting. I find it interesting how my mind works with these thoughts and emotions.

      For example, when I think of my grandmother my very first instinct is to smile. She was such a kind woman and was always very supporting to and generous with me. On the other hand, some of the people who have died, when I think of them, I have to struggle to get past the immediate rush of sadness, grief or however you want to say that. About 17 years ago, I lost a friend unexpectedly to cancer. When I think about her, even today, my immediate emotional response is sadness and loss. It seems I always have to work past those emotions to get to the good memories.

      Kindest Regards,
      A.H. Browning



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