My age

You may look at me and think,

I'm young, too young to know,

And you should be right,

But in truth that isn't so.

 

You see in just two decades,

I've seen a lot of things,

My eyes, though very young,

Have observed sharp stings.

 

I've watched many people crying,

As they lose ones they love,

I've seen people dying,

When of life they've had enough.

 

I've seen blood more than I should,

From myself and others,

I've seen the inside of an ambulance,

More times than I can number.

 

My ears, though only twenty,

Have heard horrors beyond thought,

I've overheard a murder,

Which terror to me brought.

 

I've heard people who I've trusted,

Betray me with their tongues,

I've heard emergency calls from family,

Which dragged air from my lungs.

 

I've heard the cries of animals,

In pain beyond compare,

I've heard the sobs of women,

In the depths of despair.

 

My taste buds, though young,

Remember more than they need,

Having tasted foul and fair,

Having licked at wounds that bleed.

 

They've tasted many pills,

Prescribed to help me live,

They've tasted mouldy chicken soup,

Which made me gag from fizz.

 

I've tasted dirt before,

When pushed down to the ground,

I've tasted my own bile,

When trying to cry without sound.

 

My fingers and my body,

Have felt more in 20 years,

Than most do in a lifetime,

Things normal people fear.

 

I've felt feathers of a chicken,

Matted down with blood,

Stroking as she died,

To calm her all I could.

 

I've felt stab wounds too,

When people didn't like me,

I'm no stranger to the knife,

And abuse of someone nasty.

 

My nose though still a baby,

Has smelt some awful things,

Like burning flesh and blood,

Sewage, puke and broken limbs.

 

I've smelt fear and sorrow,

It's fleshy and damp in odour,

Not exactly unpleasant,

More an unsettling ochre.

 

I identify smells with ease,

Like the scent of bogged chickens,

Or fresh and warm bread,

And strong soup as it thickens.

 

All five of my senses,

And any more besides,

Have experienced many things,

And much more that I hide.

 

I've felt blood pouring out,

From stab wounds in my side,

I've felt the strange sensation,

To watch something else die.

 

I've overheard a murder,

And witnessed many beatings,

I've smelt the nerves on people,

As they give me their greetings.

 

I've experienced terror,

For myself and others,

I've been scared for the lives,

Of my parents and my brother.

 

I've heard people call me names,

And make me feel worthless,

Heard, seen, smelt, felt and tasted,

The attacks they gave, remorseless.

 

In only 20 years,

I've lost such faith in men,

And know to only trust myself,

To not leave my door wide open.

 

It's sad really that one so young,

Has been through such pain,

And I know there's more like me,

Who people judge insane.

 

Please don't assume that age,

Determines what you know,

In fact if you believe that,

Your mind is clearly shallow.

 

One man can live to 90,

And know nothing of the world,

While a three year old learns pain,

Which from parents is hurled.

 

So if you think I'm young,

And don't know what I'm doing,

Please, first experience all I have,

You'll find it quite subduing.