Heather Harrisson

Hope

Past traumas too many to count,
Of people who told me they cared,
Only to leave when they knew the truth,
See my mind, its not quite all there.

They'd say things like "I love you
And I'll be here no matter what,
I'll stay by your side forever,
I'll love you no matter the cost."

Then they'd realise I wasn't perfect,
I had problems and sadness inside,
They'd see I couldn't always be pretty,
And I found out it all was a lie.

So I figured I had no hope,
No future with someone I loved,
Because they all left me in the end,
I gave up on praying to above.

Then along he came with his smile,
That pushed its way into my soul,
I tried to ignore my attraction,
Knew my feelings would take their toll.

I avoided the questions he asked,
I distanced myself from him,
But that only made matters worse,
I felt such longing deep within.

Angry with myself I would cry,
Yell out "stop being so stupid!",
I knew I had no chance of his love,
I hated my uncaring cupid.

Told myself even if he cares now,
You still have to tell him the truth,
About what's wrong with your body,
How your mind cannot be soothed.

When you tell him, he will drift away,
Avoid you and tell you "I'm busy",
So why let the attraction grow,
Get it over with, tell him quickly.

So I opened my mouth and I spoke,
With a truth I didn't know I had,
I told him about these past years,
How I always seem angry or sad.

I told him I'm broken inside,
And that I want him to know so that he,
Has the option to leave if he wants to,
Has the option to abandon me.

And when I had finished my speech,
There was a pause which lasted forever,
Or maybe it lasted 2 seconds,
To be honest I don't really remember.

But I remember the words that he used,
What he said when I was at done at last,
He said "Oh don't be so silly,
I wouldn't leave you over something like that.".

And I couldn't believe my ears,
And I couldn't believe my eyes,
And I waited a week for him,
To think and change his mind.

Then I waited another week,
And another and even more,
Yet still he stayed by my side,
Said he didn't want anything more.

Now it has been almost two years,
And my mind-set has started to change,
Thanks to the way that he treats me,
I feel we've been together for an age.

When I had lost all hope,
This beautiful man came along,
Brought happiness back to my life,
Brought tune back into my song.

He has changed the way I see the world,
And the way that I see me,
Told me I'm not disgusting or bad,
But funny, kind and pretty.

He gave me the hope I had lost,
That I could have a future once more,
With a person I loved who loved me,
Who hasn't left me feeling sore.

I always dreamed for someone like him,
Who loved me for who I was,
Who looked at my faults and shortcomings,
And still said that I was enough.

He gave me love when I was heartbroken,
Friendship when I was friendless,
Comfort when I had been trampled,
And hope when my life seemed hopeless.

 

Comments1

  • Konov

    May your love last :)



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