Cry out

She’s tough and she’s strong she smiles when she’s happy but the happinesses doesn’t last for long she’s strong and she’s bold. She’s been battling for so long she feels old. Even in the sun she often feels cold because inside she is weak she really doesn’t want to have to speak she says she’s not but she is afraid she wakes up and thanks God for the day he’s made with the hope she’ll make it through but what if one day she don’t - what if the person she needs doesn’t pick up the phone what if nobody looks at her hard enough to see that she is broke and that she’s wearing away day by day week by week struggling at night to get an ounce of sleep. She lays wide awake wondering what will happen the next day if it’ll be the same or if anything will change - if she’s safe if it will go away. The never ending pain dealing with depression. Getting beyond angry when people ask silly questions, listening to shouting and feeling your head instantly pounding the ground going in. The world making you think of committing the worst sin as you try to put those thoughts in the bin because that’s not who you want to be or even the future you see when your happy you picture the grass being green music and even food on the scene. This life wasn’t meant for me I just know deep down this isn’t who I’m supposed to be. The other half of me is asleep and I just want help to set her free.