The Dictionary Equals Logophile's Paradise

Nope reforming hardened criminal donning

scarred face, manacles jailhouse stripe, et cetera

nor taming screwish incorrigible guttersnipe

ain't most difficult enterprises

entailing me to wipe

dripping sweat from my hoary brow,

neither primary tsoris,

(i.e. Yiddish, asper in woeful gripe),

but reading tome thick as stovepipe

hat, I declare constitutes most grueling task

paging thru compendium of words A thru Z

may rank less purposeful than bovine tripe.

not surprisingly causing mine gray matter

(more'n fifty shades), to wanna up and scatter

fist size shot thru unnecessarily subjected

to feel like oversaturated blatter

vehemently aggrieved mad as a hatter

to appease, boost and flatter

ever shrinking fanbase blithely bandying

faux poetic pitter patter

trumpeting expansive vocabulary

enlivened, leavened, seasoned... smatter

ring poem to expressive affinity

how bajillion combinations

twenty six letters one can splatter

casually incorporating multisyllabic

word such as sesquipedalian

less to boast more so to chatter

up food for thought perhaps...

infect reader to accrue fatter

vocabulary than mine

actually rather paltry yoke cant argue

yukon (albeit figuratively) tatter

with little effort hen even

offer as hors d'oeuvres

to this storied scribbling wildcatter.