Bubeleh bride ballooned into behemoth

Fifty nine inch tall wife

once willowy wisp

postmenopausal galloping gourmandiser

playboy centerfold girly

figure ain't no mo,'

which superfluous weight deterrent,

love life yours truly

took Kamikaze nosedive

arousing, exciting, stimulating...

as romancing the stone statue,

but seen thru Tom

gobbler beady eyes

butterball babe resembles hottie

female turkey on steroids without feathers,

spouse already qualifies as Hen pecker

not admirable characteristic

to encourage physical intimacy

whew, which allows this husband

to redirect pro creative pursuits

where English language

beak homes muse,

which amateur philologist

attests to literary penchant

most likely garnering posthumous fame

revving up avast surge

necessitating Barry yore

to deter den of thieves

against stealing precious

documents - sold at auction

avid fans snapping up

bajillion tattered staind scribblings

indistinguishable from chicken scratch

interlaced with gobbledygook

(unbeknownst to John Doe

who faintly resembled me dead

drunken grizzled shabby skidrow

anonymous deceased wordsmith),

mortuary performed makeover

courtesy same Joseph and the

amazing technicolor dreamcoat

academy award winners

unexpected set couture club craze

suddenly everybody and their ilk

including grandmother goose, pink panther,

porky pig, Scoobie doobie do, ugly duckling...

triggered feverish buzz feeding frenzy

even cosmetic surgeons experienced

boomtimes, cuz ma

eternally sleeping pose

inspired cottage (cheesy) industry,

the global economy witnessed

unprecedented unsurge

ending world wide poverty.