Gangly longfellow thoreau and thru...

Well stocked with

wordsworth lx numbered yesteryear

born as predicted by

bubba's zayda longtime seer.

While in utero premier

ultrasound detected

smudged embryonic fetus

whoosh auditory proto language unclear

surprisingly enough sounded analogous

to murmuring... huh yepper sonneteer

vaguely resembling, yes

William Shakespeare

though burbling, gurgling,

requiring absolute zero noise to hear

kickstarting, reverently warbling

difficult, diligent, distinct yawping

nonetheless reckoned as dérailleur,

viz swiftly tailored

inchoate anatomical gear

hurriedly styled pièce de résistance

yours truly born with silver dictionary

in his mouth, I f¨ç˚ˆ˜© swear

unusual biological phenomena

drew pediatricians far and near,

which (no surprise) determined

English major as academic career

matriculating upon immediately

exiting birth canal whip smart derriere

i.e. (ŧ§), spread like wildfire, where

media hounds blitzkrieg stunned to stare

not at me but bare

naked lady in no mood...ready to tear

away sophisticated audiovisual equipment

understandably on verge going nuclear

furious, (this told me later in life as here

say), she quickly (albeit groggy)

curtly demanded fair

remuneration, and milked

infant me as cash cow profiteer,

her eyes aglitter signaling,

shining, seeing... gold

let whoever sneer

earning money with initial gasp of air

freeing parents to live

within lap of luxury

world wide web sightseer,

yours truly received

royal carpet treatment everywhere

crisscrossing the globe

accoutered with most

expensive designer babywear

obliviously prattling, jabbering, gabbling...

invariably drawing throngs

across entire northern hemisphere

broadcast as podcast across atmosphere

all across the universe hoodwinking

convincing many of "FAKE" poetic story

concoction courtesy adept fictioneer.