aS lOnG As yOu KnOw ThE tRuTh

My mother was the last to witness me shed the tears of a broken mind,

My old friend was the last to comfort me, defeated by all the lies.

Unfortunately me and her lost contact, so there I lied defeated for three more years in silence. 

He knew what he was doing, he knew the strings he had to pull to make me feel stagnant

And you?

You were there for every moment, not just with him but for who had yet to come

You witnessed my pain first hand and I trusted you with every agonizing ounce.

You slept in the same exact bed where he took my virginity

But that's okay 

As long as you know the truth.

I know I always try to suffer in silence, but you cannot deny I let you in to the jigsaw puzzle that is my mind.

No I did not tell you every detail but you knew how every tower fell

No I was not direct with you from the jump, but a true friend would never need that hunch

But its okay right?

As long as you know the truth

Do you really think that if I never tore down his ego you would be the "star girl" he would go for?

But that doesn't matter, because I did, and he did, and you?

You did too, every step of the way slithering in the shadows, and me?

Hanging on to hope that you would put your friend that has loved you from the start first.

How silly i was to trust in you to not do the worst.

But its okay 

As long as you know the truth

He has lied to you already but that's okay right?

Because he brings you flowers, he tells you you're beautiful, makes you feel as if you're different from any other conquest, and trust me you are.

You respect what he did to me, and everything that happened between us?

My dear friend you have no concept of respect, and neither does he, how perfect the two of you will forever be.

 I thought of your feelings first the whole step of the way, never giving myself the time to react

You made it seem as if I was making you choose between two paths 

The reality is there should have never been a path to choose from in the first place

But that's okay

As long as you know the truth.

My own mother witnessed my mind crumble from the age of 15

The friends we shared told me I deserved better, including you.

You're right I do deserve better

Better than him, better than you

You found your peace before I could, but now I am free of you.

Free of you, free of him, free of this torturous chapter

Thank you.

The truth is

My dear friend you felt pretty and wanted

The attention I have received my whole life was now coming your way, and this was new for you

It must have been thrilling, to get consumed in those beautiful lies.

So thrilling you have lost the concept of right and wrong

It's okay I never did and I never will

my pain does not belong to either of you, it is mine to keep.

Let that pain reep

What a beautiful love story, sacrificing the loyalty of a friend for a boy who holds the same values as you.

The two of you will last life long, holding a love that is pure and true

Forever sharing a bond of tearing apart the same person

I will not take this lesson for granted

I know the truth

Do you?