I, a Hydrophobic with a Deep Love for the Sea

I, a hydrophobic with a deep love for the sea,
find defeat hiding inside pulsating ecstasy.
I, made up of many thousand parts and one,
yearn for singularity, and then sometimes for none.

I who spent my precious years prostrate in the church,
am deaf to the profundity inherent in the search.

I, made up of endless whispers, unending befores,
cannot really see myself. Translation dies in lore.
Today's hydrophobia has deep love for the sea,
loss is a locked box ablaze, containing its own key.