Enigmatic Talk Show Host

Better the devil you know,

Than the one you don’t.

Better the devil you don’t,

Than a TV host.

I am dripping in disguise,

Deception negates loathing.

I’ve gorged on your attention,

I’ve outgrown my sheep’s clothing.

I am the devil in your doors,

Welcomed to your screen.

A cuckoo in the nest,

If only you knew the unseen.

Think of me as a friend,

A champion of the pariah.

Engineered smile and scripted laugh,

Let me be your morning messiah.

And I shall unto thee depart my views,

Or a pile of profitable lies.

Why bother with honesty and trust?

When lights and camera hypnotise.

My palms are a nations plates,

They dare not bite the hand that feeds.

I am stood with bread and fish,

They are pigeons to my seeds.

Comes the night, the camera dies,

My inhibitions start to rise,

My sheeply skin slowly rips,

The money pours in, the facade slips.

No man, nor beast, nor woman, nor gheist,

Would recognise the cocaine christ.

I’m a gorgeous vessel sin-filled to the top,

Pink balloon of tar, about to pop.

My home is my castle,

King of drugs, women and dreams.

Up at 6am for preaching,

Through your TV screens.