Turkey mystery

 

Someone calls the police

Please call them anyone

I left my turkey in the oven

Now my turkey is gone

I put it in early this morning

And it was smelling so nice

Then I make a macaroni pie

But had no sweet pepper for the fried rice

So just drove down to shop rite

But the line was very long

So, while waiting I put on my earplugs

And listening to some chutney soca songs

I know my turkey will be sizzling by now

Succulent, dark and well done

But when I come back home

My fifteen-pound turkey was gone

I look all over the house

I even look outside in the backyard

And when the police came

They see me sitting on my front steps looking sad

I missing my turkey " Officer

You have to put out an APB

And lock up the person

Who steals my turkey from me?

The APB apprehended a turkey in Jersey

But it was still frozen

So that was ruled out

As the turkey from my oven

Then they took a report and description

and then before they drive away

they said the detectives will call you later

meanwhile, look for friends or family with a turkey that they could share with me today

Then my doorbell rang

And there was detective Columbo with a cigar in his hand

And while fumbling through his coat pocket

He said I am detective Columbo " sir

Do you have a match I can borrow?

So, I explained to him about my situation

As he stood with his notepad writing

Then he looks up at me and said

" Sir I think I know what is the problem here, sir

“Sir your turkey is missing "

But later when he left

That was the last of him I see

I guess his show got canceled

Or he went back to reruns on Cozi TV

But still, my turkey was missing

And I don't know who steal my turkey

I guess I will call Jessica from "murder she wrote"

To help solve my missing turkey mystery

But that would take too long

She property living in California

And by the time she gets to Staten Island

The Thanksgiving will be over

Same time I saw Kanye west passing

And I said yo " Kanye someone steals my turkey

He said " kaz imma let you finish”

But Beyonce has the best turkey of all times, of all times"

yes, some stole my turkey

and I getting no help at all

I am running out of options

Of who to call

 

I even call the Trinidad and Tobago police service

Hoping they could help their fellow Trinidadian

But they tell me to go outside

And look and see where the feller went

 

So, I decided to call some friends and family

And ask for a little slice

To go with my macaroni pie

And vegetable fried rice

Mrs. spinner didn't answer

And Jonnie phone was off

Jason said he didn't make any turkey

He just cooks a put of fish broff

my associate Vinnie tells me that I call too late

he just took the last leg in his plate

but say don’t worry kaz “I got you

for 2019 thanksgiving if you can wait

 

who steals my turkey?

please tell me, anyone,

the police not helping me

and I don’t know where my turkey has gone

 

So, I send out some message on messenger

Hoping one of my friends would have some extra to share

But when coming to Thanksgiving turkey

No one had any to spare

 

New York police not helping and Trinidad police can't solve a crime

So, I call my cousin sherry in Texas

To ask her if she knows “Sheriff Walt Longmire”

She said “CUZ where you been boy, it's a few years now that show is off the air

 

So Now all hope of finding my turkey

 is surely gone

But the memory of seeing it in the oven

 will definitely live on

 

so now I sit down on my sofa crying

getting high with a bottle of brandy

when all of a sudden I heard my alarm ringing

and when I look at my phone it was early Thanksgiving morning “a quarter to three

 

so, get up and ran to my refrigerator

and right there was my season uncooked turkey

so, all this drama was just a nightmare of a dream

that’s why no one has solved my turkey mystery