Restless thoughts

My friend slit his own throat, and I must admit it’s hard to fucking cope

My homegirl started sucking my ex’s dick,yeah it stings but gee I wonder does she swallow or spit?

Thoughts of suicide run through my head especially on late nights when I cry in bed

I’m miles away from the only people that have my back, it makes me feel vulnerable to any attack

I hate who I have become, I must admit my legs burn from how much I run

I run from my problems

I run from my emotions

I run from my own devotions

I try to give you all my best smile and it works for a while

But somewhere along the line I have been labeled as a big joke

People assume my loyalty is some big hoax

Maybe it is

My friend, I should have answered my fuckin phone

Girl, I should have just left you alone

I don’t have an explanation for my actions

I don’t know the laws to attraction

I just wanted a fucking distraction

I am more than an emotional mess

I am more than my own distress

I don’t want to close my self out but every day I am reminded of my doubts

Please just put me to rest