Goodnight Mrs Calabash

My mother told me when I was a little girl

Hey don 't give your love away;

She told me to be

Harder than iron and sharper than razors that

Always cut right to the bone.

She said:

“Freedom, is just a four letter word,

Money, is all that counts in this world.”

Yeah. I suppose you're thinking that's not really a good thing, but believe me, friend, my mother knew what she was talking about.

So when you ask me “do I really love you,”

All I can find to tell you

Is that you're a man,

I'm a woman, and that is as far as it goes.

I can't give that thing away.

No:

“Freedom, is just a four letter word,

Money, is all that counts in this world.”

That's all there is to it, everything else is just lies and pain, nothing more, nothing less, just a fabulous dream that will never come true.

Go, now, ask what you want of those girls in the street,

Give them your cash on the nail,

That way you are sure

To have everything that you paid for, no more,

And no more stupid complaints.

I mean:

“Freedom is just a four letter word,

Money, is all that counts in this world.”

And don't go telling everybody I'm a mean bitch, I didn't create the world as it is. It was all your tin-pot idols that you put up on a pedestal and applaud for their lies.

So remember:

“Freedom is just a four letter word,

Money, is all that counts in this world.”

Yeah, freedom. No cash. Oh lord, gimme a break. One more year. Or two. Then a couple of bullets right in the brain.

“Hey, lady, you'd better move on out of here.”

“What's wrong, officer, what did I do? I was only expressing my pain.”

You see

“Freedom is just a four letter word,

Money is all that counts in this world.”

“Yeah, I know all about that, but these people are not interested.”

“No?”

“No. Mr Monroe here, his dog is sick. Mrs McCready, she's on hyperaxonol. Mr Blake's wife has just left him, and Mrs Purblind has vaginal herpes.”

“I see. Just one more time?”