Agony XoX

I feel paralysed. Naked in a winter storm.

Exposed.

The wind whipping me with every opportunity

to inflict more pain

on this broken canvas.

Earthquakes shudder from within, silent,

but as violent as the merciless north;

there is no sympathy where nature dwells within me.

No cure for the poison ivy that grips my heart

with claws of passionate anger,

twisting with cold, cold venom.

My lungs are on fire, but you see nothing burning.

My legs are earthquakes, but you just see me,

numb.

My heart is falling into the void of my despair,

but you just see the smile.

You see the mask, the façade, the plastic elation

that secludes the darkness that lurks,

embracing its demon children with desperate
fury.

What do I see?

I see suffering, never-ending,

that tumbles in agonising waterfalls down

the innocent palette of her cheek.

I see a painting, perturbed by ink

that has poisoned its beauty.

I see a masterpiece, a girl, who was created

in the eyes of someone who sees her as perfect

with a soul of pure hope and passion,

but alas, this girl is frozen in that despair

that burns her skin and scorches her spirit.

She can’t escape this cage; it confines her,

luring her back in with sweet promises

that echo in lovers’ hearts,

but the promises are empty.

There’s nothing in this bowl of life,

for the fruit – and the flowers – have decayed

along with her joy.

All the flowers are dead.