Aging long haired pencil neck geezer

(alternately titled no particular reason:

bring unto “fake” trumpeting Caesar

seven salad dressings from deep freezer

and lettuce deign at your plea azure.)

Graced with boyish good looks,

innocence and naiveté to boot,

an especial loathing toward me

chicken legs re: spindleshanks

(which serve as laughingstock

of dis hair reed ole coot)

oft times clad with deep purple

polka dotted sweatpants

don this nontrumpeting galoot

Asian old wise owl chimes utters

embarrassing non repeatable hoot

thus even bestowed with ample loot

to purchase peloton bike

would be laudatory suggestion,

nevertheless vigorous exercise point iz moot

cuz said skinny limb foregone conclusion

impossible mission anatomical feature aye

(nor anyone else could ever troubleshoot).

See them dang toothpick

aforementioned limbs used walking

permanently stunted courtesy anorexia nervosa,

I experienced during prepubescence

comprises subject of mooch talking

especially if yours truly wore shorts,

or even daresay skivvies out in public.

Both above listed portion of poem I write

surprisingly, truthfully, and

aye preferably, and uncomfortably uninvite
today (night) May 12th, actually tonight

electronically date/time stamped

05/12/20 10:06:21 PM

presented scary sight

regarding every other

regular instance I showered

as occurred earlier... quite
lamentable, these twiggy

body parts give Lesley Hornby

Dame Lesley Lawson DBE

blink to fast, and she becomes an oversight

born September 19, 1949

still going strong, flitting light
to and fro, hither and yon
an English model, actress, and singer,

renown during the nineteen sixties
approximately 5′ 6″ in height
widely known by the nickname Twiggy

get a serious a run for her money

totally unbeknownst to her

if so, she would serious take flight.

Matthew Scott Harris bejesus, he tried
(think self starvation)
nearly successful being unseen,

yours truly set his permanent physique
as one wimpy, scraggly, and nerdy teen

unlike above faded former star
regaled as Twiggy on silver screen,

yet his posthumous fifteen

minutes of fame encompasses

poetic style like (like for real) never seen

arose during 2020 pandemic
i.e. coronavirus CPVID-19 quarantine

and commenced quirky endeavor

crafting slapdash poetaster philistine

nonsensical, heretical (rather hair reticle),

and atypical ridiculous rhyme
wondering if ye keen

find any redeeming quality

courtesy this human haz been.