Lonely Moment

A Boy With Roses

Floating adrift an endless sea of ocean blue

There was a time when everything was fine

I was happy in the silence, taking things for granted

Then this storm came in and sent me flying

I had no idea it was going to happen

 

In the darkness I was dead there

Head first, unconscious and slumped over

On the cold, wooden pulp

Spread out like the wings of an eagle

Spread out like some whore

I had no pulse, made no movement

I was gone

Holding a serious frown

In the dream I was marching to Heaven

I burst into burrows of adolescent laughter

Chasing after rainbow colours for the fun of it

I told the Drum Major I can't explain it

In the rush hour I flowed like music

Wind by the green belt

A faint smile was born just after 7 a.m.

A colossal abyss propelled me into oblivion

I didn't expect the thing to consume my aching soul

Now I feel as empty as a hole

I have a thorn in my side, planning my suicide

The noise of the night traffic has petered out like a candle flame

I can't take anymore pain

I've laid down in a deep-rooted infection

I must have misplaced my mind

I don't know where the fuck I'm going

I jettisoned the bellyful stripling

At the ben of innocence, I am elegant

Nothing more than a boy

Turning myself on and off, on and off

My arm sits in the plaster of Paris

I've suffered from an orgy of intrusive thoughts

The night is paralysed in its costume

There is a nuance in the precept

That I can't avoid

When the feeling gets the best of me                                                                                     

I notice it more then I want to kill myself                                                                           

Sometimes I want to be someone else just for a second                               

Then, when the tough gets going                                                                                   

I bite into the cyanide tooth                                                                                                     

I've spiralled to a rocky low                                                                                                     

Warm waves sparkle under the sun                                                                               

I've said so many things                                                                                                         

Now the cat's got my tongue                                                                                           

I've grown bored of the daily routine                                                   

My thoughts burst into flames and then incinerate                                                                               

I spent over a thousand days writing a dossier                                                                             

Then I closed my eyes and I drifted off to sleep                                                                   

I fell into a heap of dreams to the sound of a fiddle                                                           

Lightly playing like the light drizzle

 

Walking through new thresholds

In the heat of the summer

I could've flaked out

It was as if a red monkey was holding me hostage

I went limp like a flower without its glow

A poet without a flow

Thunder struck the 3rd ultimo

Over and over again, the afternoon was a breeze                                                                           

In St. Tropez, I shined with my silver scars                                                                         

The dog's paw tasted like vinegar                                                                                     

All day I dreamt and pretty much done nothing                                                             

All across the city lissome cats meow and purr                                                             

On Mondays when the clouds fade                                                                                       

I can't pretend I'm a ray of sunshine                                                                                         

I can't stop this whirlwind unfolding                                                                                                   

I'm a passenger in my mind                                                                                         

Most mornings I put paper pigeons and voodoo dolls                                                               

With my collection of candytufts in a little brown box           

I spent all night untangling my thoughts                                                                 

Monumental pains are shooting through my body                                                               

I'm praying the pains will go away but they only ululate                                                     

Something is in the offing                                                                                                       

Surely the night can't die out                                                                                             

Until I've taken off my rose tinted glasses?                                                                                       

That's what the rulebook says                                                                                                         

I smoke and drink and do what I do best                                                                   

Wishing I was dead.

 

 

 

  • Author: Jordan Cash (Pseudonym) (Offline Offline)
  • Published: June 7th, 2020 11:19
  • Category: Unclassified
  • Views: 9
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Comments +

Comments1

  • AwHec8

    Good God in His Kingdom Jordan I felt the pain of your poem in my living room. Just Saying



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