Addicted

I’m trying hard to find a way
I need a source for inspiration
I always have a lot to say
Yet my thoughts are just not flowing
Perhaps it’s time that I describe
The way I feel and what I need
No matter what, I can’t slow down
Because my life must keep on going.

I always seem to feel alive
When the night starts getting closer
As the sun starts fading down
And it hides behind still waters
It’s my time to fantasize
And let my craziness take over
The world I've built inside my head
Keeps me sane and safe from others.

I still don’t fully understand
The need to escape when I'm stone sober
Some stick needles in their arms
Hit the pipe to smoke some rocks
Drink, snort, take down some pills
I just can't tell them how to live
I much rather stay away
This other life has vowed to kill me.

After countless bad decisions
There's no room for hedonism 
I don't want to hurt myself
No matter how fucked up things get
I learned to chill and fantasize
Get really high on my own life
This is the only chance I'll get
To find the peace that I deserve.