Attempt to cheer and rally sagging spirits of Karen Windle

Before golden opportunity

(goes no argh hue mint
the way of Long John Silver)
doth fade and dwindle

not necessarily cuz the missus
did (NOT) bribe and swindle

an ambition (for nor rhyme nor reason)
arose to kindle...

Affectionate communication
employing (figurative) gambol

probably testing your patience
to decrypt me trademark ramble

essential crux of matter after

ye prune thorny verbiage,

metaphorical berry good bramble.

Methinks yar psyche slid into funk

cuz usual upbeat gregarious disposition

of late (June 26th, 2020)
analogous to reclusive monk

whose nonverbal body language

shrieks "LEAVE ME THE ƒµ©* ALONE"

lest recipient (in this case yours truly)
receives judicious suckerpunch

finding him landing - ouch

on his buttucks - kerplunk!

Nevertheless as one

mister misanthrope to another

who could pretend cavorting

as asinine make bull heave brother,

(or undergoing extreme makeover,

and stretching imagination voila
one garden variety generic beastie boy

rendered into... yup, your grandmother.

Hoop fully no unpleasant memory

doth suddenly unfold

linkedin to said very old

boot (moost likely)
long deceased family member
turned to dust commingled with auld

Lang syne amidst weathered tombstones,

markedly intact skeletons absent

any flesh o'the rear

some etched with hands folded in prayer

mausoleum enshrining even in death near

(think grim reaper kingly leer)

still provoking jeer
profligate (yet prolific) paperback writer heir

housing generations ghostly forebear

comprising your family tree, once... dear

father, mother, sister, brother, et cetera

who profusely guzzled beer.

No intent to induce fury if playful banter
loosed psychological trip wire

merely harmless ambition to deliver mirth

lobs strike out as decided
by just now summoned umpire

on the ball punning away without tire

greatly flattered if literary antics inspire

ye to pen memoirs,

which become New York Times

bestseller, thus countless clamoring demands
to serve as ghostwriter hire

prompt ye with fame and fortune

before thee doth exhale last breath and expire

when moments prior,

I while impersonating a squire
wished ye a cheery bon voyage.