Amid relation

Last year, I admired wines. This, I'm wondering inside the red world
Last year, I gazed at the fire. This year I'm burnt kabob.
Love drove me down to the water, where I drunk the moon's reflection.
Now I'm just a girl staring up totally lost with the thing itself.
I no longer long for love, look in my face.
Soul drunk, heart washed away,
Just like a cat, I adopted this affection,
it grew bolder, the noise I couldn't handle,
and the scratches on my skin, threw it through the window
Then again, when an owl lands on your shoulder, you put it down,
it'll burn with rage,
Though the cat is already dead.
So I chose rage to love, I mean cat! For now how can I pick what ain't breathing!?