Valentine's Day 2021

Yours truly not necessarily

romantic fellow at heart

more accurately methinks myself

lame and inadequate sorry excuse

for reasonably rhyming spouse,

but courtesy after sipping

(née - chugging away

like snorting caboose)

Welch's sparkling white grape juice

maybe accompanied with entree couscous

generic and garden variety

run of the mill by the floss husband

ordinarily fancy free and footloose

feigned being inebriated

noisily squawking - imitating

deafening honking lunging goose

creating ruckus whereby resultant outcome

whereby wife playfully threatened me

to hang me (all choking aside) with noose,

(I needed to gibbet a chance)

as ye can accurately dead deuce

nearly turning unnatural shade of chartreuse,

thus I immediately called truce

after hiring team of animated experts

Rocky the squirrel

and Bullwinkle the moose.

Once upon a time I

bouncing up and down

analogous to yoyo

rode proud on his high horse whoa

considered himself, albeit kiddingly

as pure as the driven though

fell prey to basic proto

human barking animal propensity

desire under the Elm you know

all to well that biological urge

goading species to reproduce

when consummated minus

utilization of prophylactics

to aid and abet begetting embryo

unborn or unhatched offspring

in process of development,

particularly human offspring during

period from approximately

second to eighth week after fertilization

(subsequently termed a fetus).

Back in the day

gathering rosebuds while I may

thy pure motive to lay

me down with barenaked lady

futile (yet Prince Valiant) attempt

to placate seething hormonal secretion

surging testosterone seemingly went away

(I strongly suspect absent libinal longing

courtesy side effect half dozen medications)

bodes ill with spouse

marriage doth severely fray.