Just for laughs
Old man have I become
My family thinks to remove me from my home
Its better they say showing me a new place much farther away
I look down at my feet
Past my gut thats sits over my belt not so neat today.
Cluttering my way are papers and books
The daughter says they're of no use only
To cause an accident
She likes to tell me off as if I'm inadequate.
The new place is full of old people
I'm not ready to be this old
I've still got it going on
A small chap comes and says welcome to paradise
I grimace and reply with a slight but unsure smile
He lifts his straw hat and shakes it at a lady
Let's get outta here for a while he whispers to me
(I think!)
He laughs and takes me to a large open area full of faces I dont know
See! he says this is retirement at its best
Sorry! I say I'm not here yet and turn to go
FIfty years of rest he continues saying, It's got everything you need
A woman calls from the doorway and he says
It's paradise here you know and gives me A wink.
If you want you can get viagra too.
I stand still not understanding what I'm supposed to do
Some body taps my shoulder
Do you want a dance she says
I trip and nearly fall over
I think I'm in the wrong place but she grabs my arm
And takes me to the middle of the room
My name's Grace
She swings me left then right until I'm dizzy.
Theres no music only a clatter of teacups and plates
I'm thinking of how to escape
My eyes fixed to the doorway of which Id came
My feet drag me towards the exit grace still holding tight to my sleeve
I've got to go now please!
She's not willing to let me leave .
One last dance she says
Clinging tight to me
I pull my self from her hold and shuffle as fast as I can down the corridor
Passing the staff
Wheeling a Trolly of afternoons snacks
No thanks I say
I'm not staying
I'm not old yet .
As I reach towards the handle to vacate this place
A husky voice from behind makes me jump
Are we going now friend?
I cant wait, shoving his hand at me
Look!
I've got Some pot we can take
You can have half
I use it medically
But it'll make you laugh!
Nothing will make me laugh I said as he took a long draw inhaling hard
I used to be funny he said
Fifty years ago
I was in the best place on earth .
I don't know how to respond only to ask
Are you happy ?
I think I'd like one last chance he said
And throws me a mischievous look
Just for laughs!
Just for laughs
Old man have I become
My family thinks to remove me from my home
Its better they say showing me a new place much farther away
I look down at my feet
Past my gut thats sits over my belt not so neat today.
Cluttering my way are papers and books
The daughter says they're of no use only
To cause an accident
She likes to tell me off as if I'm inadequate.
The new place is full of old people
I'm not ready to be this old
I've still got it going on
A small chap comes and says welcome to paradise
I grimace and reply with a slight but unsure smile
He lifts his straw hat and shakes it at a lady
Let's get outta here for a while he whispers to me
(I think!)
He laughs and takes me to a large open area full of faces I dont know
See! he says this is retirement at its best
Sorry! I say I'm not here yet and turn to go
FIfty years of rest he continues saying, It's got everything you need
A woman calls from the doorway and he says
It's paradise here you know and gives me A wink.
If you want you can get viagra too.
I stand still not understanding what I'm supposed to do
Some body taps my shoulder
Do you want a dance she says
I trip and nearly fall over
I think I'm in the wrong place but she grabs my arm
And takes me to the middle of the room
My name's Grace
She swings me left then right until I'm dizzy.
Theres no music only a clatter of teacups and plates
I'm thinking of how to escape
My eyes fixed to the doorway of which Id came
My feet drag me towards the exit grace still holding tight to my sleeve
I've got to go now please!
She's not willing to let me leave .
One last dance she says
Clinging tight to me
I pull my self from her hold and shuffle as fast as I can down the corridor
Passing the staff
Wheeling a Trolly of afternoons snacks
No thanks I say
I'm not staying
I'm not old yet .
As I reach towards the handle to vacate this place
A husky voice from behind makes me jump
Are we going now friend?
I cant wait, shoving his hand at me
Look!
I've got Some pot we can take
You can have half
I use it medically
But it'll make you laugh!
Nothing will make me laugh I said as he took a long draw inhaling hard
I used to be funny he said
Fifty years ago
I was in the best place on earth .
I don't know how to respond only to ask
Are you happy ?
I think I'd like one last chance he said
And throws me a mischievous look
Just for laughs!
Old man have I become
My family thinks to remove me from my home
Its better they say showing me a new place much farther away
I look down at my feet
Past my gut thats sits over my belt not so neat today.
Cluttering my way are papers and books
The daughter says they're of no use only
To cause an accident
She likes to tell me off as if I'm inadequate.
The new place is full of old people
I'm not ready to be this old
I've still got it going on
A small chap comes and says welcome to paradise
I grimace and reply with a slight but unsure smile
He lifts his straw hat and shakes it at a lady
Let's get outta here for a while he whispers to me
(I think!)
He laughs and takes me to a large open area full of faces I dont know
See! he says this is retirement at its best
Sorry! I say I'm not here yet and turn to go
FIfty years of rest he continues saying, It's got everything you need
A woman calls from the doorway and he says
It's paradise here you know and gives me A wink.
If you want you can get viagra too.
I stand still not understanding what I'm supposed to do
Some body taps my shoulder
Do you want a dance she says
I trip and nearly fall over
I think I'm in the wrong place but she grabs my arm
And takes me to the middle of the room
My name's Grace
She swings me left then right until I'm dizzy.
Theres no music only a clatter of teacups and plates
I'm thinking of how to escape
My eyes fixed to the doorway of which Id came
My feet drag me towards the exit grace still holding tight to my sleeve
I've got to go now please!
She's not willing to let me leave .
One last dance she says
Clinging tight to me
I pull my self from her hold and shuffle as fast as I can down the corridor
Passing the staff
Wheeling a Trolly of afternoons snacks
No thanks I say
I'm not staying
I'm not old yet .
As I reach towards the handle to vacate this place
A husky voice from behind makes me jump
Are we going now friend?
I cant wait, shoving his hand at me
Look!
I've got Some pot we can take
You can have half
I use it medically
But it'll make you laugh!
Nothing will make me laugh I said as he took a long draw inhaling hard
I used to be funny he said
Fifty years ago
I was in the best place on earth .
I don't know how to respond only to ask
Are you happy ?
I think I'd like one last chance he said
And throws me a mischievous look
Just for laughs!
- Author: R.cdmoore (Pseudonym) ( Offline)
- Published: May 6th, 2021 13:28
- Category: Unclassified
- Views: 15
Comments3
Woah oh gah so thats how old peoples homes are?? Do they have entertainment like dancing and stuff and what if one has his wife too. But i can totally understand your not being ready to be old and plunged into a world of strangers with no familiar faces. I wouldn't agree to it when i grew old. Your poem is amusing and super awesome to read of. Kudos!!!
Ash cheers thanks not sure why its repeated itself here I used copy and paste maybe I am old hahaha..
Actually it's based upon a super funny film I watched on netflix 2 old buddies meet up accidentally in a retirement home and escape to experience one last chance at a road trip .glad you laughed
immersive and delicately worded, a fun read
thanks for sharing
Thanks .Sometimes it's okay to write some nonsence it comes easier more so than wrecking your head to write something great with phrases of words and a dictionary to look them up !
As I age disgracefully and accept my failings then I find it easy to slip into your kind of mirthful acceptance of the ridicule which faces us all in this well written piece. Very entertaining.
Thanks ..im not there yet either but I have a elderly father whom.would hit me with his walking stick if I tried to make him feel his 94 year old age 🤣🤣🤣
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