MOTHER OF ALL SORROWS

Thirteen year back... I was working as a sales engineer, destined to sell huge excavators for a living. The meager income status forced me to share a room with Arun, my best pal, at Elsa tourist home - a nearly dilapidated structure that stood on steel concrete, next to the Trivandrum Medical College. He was a house-surgeon, undergoing one year training period after the completion of MBBS degree (Bachelor of Medicine and Bachelor of Surgery).

Life-saver and a gravedigger!  What a grave combination!

‘Excessive workload, without proper remuneration and recognition and the notorious hostile approach by authorities and public!’ Being a house-surgeon is the toughest period in the life of every medical student. And without their share, it's impossible to run a Medical College! 

♥                                                                     

For the last ten days, Arun was in charge of night duty at the children's ward and literally he was fed up of the noise there... never-ending screams of children and women! Usually, he used to return by around seven in the morning and immediately he goes to bed even before brushing his teeth! But, on that day.... he was sitting awake on bed, keeping a pillow on his lap, with empty eyes.

‘Arun, are you not sleeping today?’

‘I don't think that I can sleep today,’ he sank into the bed and started staring at the ceiling. 

‘You look very depressed... What happened dear friend? Did you have a fight with her?’

‘Premji... yesterday night, I had to witness the saddest event of my life,’ he closed his eyes for some time.

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‘It was around eight o'clock in the evening and I was sitting in the casualty, all alone, after the completion of rounds. You know, Anitha, my friend, was on leave and luckily there were no serious cases to be taken care of. Then, she came... empty-handed... with a boy around six years... At the very first look, I could understand that he was suffering from Japan fever... quite common now in places very near to seashores... Poor boy... he was shivering with high temperature... the fever... it had affected his brain,’ Arun became silent for a moment.

‘Then?’ I asked with painful anxiety.

‘I admitted him immediately to the intensive care unit (ICU) and started medication after contacting Prof. Dr Haridas. You know Premji... after all it is a government institution... we have limitations everywhere... Luckily, he started responding to the medicines... temperature reduced... She was sitting outside the ICU praying silently, while the boy was sleeping inside like uprooted spinach.’

‘Did you have anything?’ I asked.

‘No doctor... How is my son? Will he be alright?’ she asked.

‘Let's hope so,’ I consoled her and I summoned one of the attenders to get her some food.

‘Sir... he is my one and only kid... His father is no more and I have no relatives other than him... Sir, I was working as a home-nurse in the home of an aged couple... My son got this fever from the local school where water is so contaminated... They helped me get some medical aid from a nearby private hospital... but, how can a helpless mother like me meet the expenses,’ poor woman, aged around thirty seven, wiped her tears with her very old faded cotton Sari like her faded life.

Poor woman didn't have anything to change also and the rich are selling their old clothes at retail chains like Big Bazaar! Bastards! I felt a twinge of pain deep within.

‘Don't worry.... He will be alright by His mercy,’ I tried to console her before going back to casualty. 

Another mother with a very beautiful young girl appeared in the casualty. She was also admitted to the ICU. Both the women sat on long chairs, outside ICU. 

♥                                                                     

It was nearing eleven thirty and I checked the boy's condition again. But, his condition was getting deteriorated fast. ‘Anything might happen,’ the empty face of the aged nurse stood beside me warned. She might have seen thousands of cases like this in her service life! I should inform her as early as possible. 

How to break a bad news? It's really important for any Doctor as there are maximum possibilities of getting hit! She was waiting for me near the ICU entrance, and the other woman was sleeping on dirty floor, covered with mosquitoes.

‘Sir, how is he?’ she asked while looking into my eyes.

Eyes, they are the most dangerous organs in human body as they cannot hide lies! 

‘He is not,’ I tried to tell the truth, but she didn't allow me to complete.

‘Sir... please, save my son... I have nobody other than him... Sir, this moment... you are my God... you are God... you can save him... Sir... you can only save him... you are my God,’ poor woman was so confident in a doctor like me!

‘God! Where are you! And where am I?’ My heart started screaming for his mercy...

I went back and tried to sleep little bit, sitting on my chair. You can sleep in war-torn Somalia peacefully... but, it is quite unthinkable in any cities in Kerala! Mosquitoes fly around like continuous bullet fire from enemy guns... Garbage... Garbage everywhere... Even an IAS officer’s wife throws garbage straight on the road! God! Please give me some chloroform... let me sleep for some time! 

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‘Sir, please come with me... the boy started gasping,’ the aged nurse woke me up at around two o'clock and I followed her to the ICU. 

‘Let's give him Oxygen,’ I said. ‘The ventilator is out of order.’ 

‘Sir... I don't think he will.’

‘No assumptions... let's pray,’ I couldn't take away my eyes from his cherubic face.

Sadly I knew... she was right... She had witnessed many more deaths than me!

‘Sir, let's inform her... otherwise it's going to be a problem.’

There she was on the dead cold dirty floor. 

‘Let her sleep,’ I didn't want to interrupt her last peaceful slumber.

‘As you wish,’ the nurse went back. 

♥                                                                     

‘Sir... he is no more,’ the nurse informed me at around four o'clock in the morning.

We woke her up.

‘Sir... my son?’ she asked in panic.

‘Dear sister… See... I am no God... I am just a helpless Doctor,’ I couldn't speak any further. Something was chocking my soul...

‘Sir?’ She stood like struck by a lightening.

‘Yes... he is no more,’ the experienced nurse informed her calmly.

She sat on the chair, closing her face with her empty hands and we stood beside her like two stone pillars. She lifted up her head after five minutes.

‘Sir, will you please do me a favour?’ She asked calmly.

‘Yes... surely... please tell me.’

‘Sir... Please make immediate arrangements... that young girl in ICU will lose her eyesight... if the corneas in both of her eyes are not replaced within a week... how sad...Let her see the world through his eyes.’

♥                                                                     

‘And then?’ I couldn’t resist my heart.

‘She walked away in the darkness’ replied Dr Arun… ‘Empathy, thy name is mother!’

Premji