Neil Higgins

The Bounder Of Askervilles


Notice of absence from Neil Higgins
Me going to be very busy for a while so wont be on the site for a short period of time.
I will return however quite soon.

In England's meanest bog,
as the clock struck the hour 13.
With gas and odours rising,
it's smell so pungent and mean.
There came a man of bones and wreck,
whose stature bent and crease.
With unkempt hair and whitish beard,
he looked as pale deceased.
Yet he was very living proof,
from the corner of this land,
with pointed hat and little black cat,
was tourists charms command.
He was for grockles pleasure,
A sight to clap and behold.
For he would dance his sermon,
for threepence we be told.
He also sang a lullaby that worded earful tune,
but if you walked and ignored it,
his helpers in the gloom,
would fleece your trouser pockets,
and bash you over the head.
Then phone your mates via cell,
and say that you were dead.
His house of straw and wooden piles,
was lurking in big hole.
Yet soon his luck would empty day,
as from that London town,
came Scarlot Ways and her assistant,
Mr Hopeless and his owl.
They set to work immediately and began to scam a plan.
If they could capture him alive,
then they would be so wise,
and claim all the glory and maybe a little prize.
Yet they had not reckoned for the man's infernal trick,
turned into a mutt he could and smite you very quick.
Yet Scarlot Ways was clever lass with rope and string and paper.
As Dr hopeless unleashed his owl who hooted a winning caper.
The meanest bog is no more as builders came to work.
Two thousand houses were built to last,
and all the land did perk.
Yet late in to a summer breeze,
if you do tune your ears.
You often here a demented tune,
barking woof woof sounding jeers.

Comments13

  • aDarkerMind

    fun...
    and very clever with it Neil;

    impressed, as always.

  • Neil Higgins

    Thank you.
    Not based on any well known detective (honest)
    This was something I wrote years ago,and had forgotten about,until I decided to dust it down a few weeks ago.
    Glad you liked the read my friend.

  • Saxon Crow

    I love this period you're going through Neil. Rwally enjoying your story poems

  • Neil Higgins

    Thank you SC
    I should have been born late Victorian early Edwardian period.Although social housing,poor laws,etc,would have meant I would have lived to the ripe old age of 10,if lucky.
    But for what ever reason,and maybe because of my love of Dickens,and I know he isn't everyone's favourite,but this time period appeals to me.
    As do the Dark Ages.And the pre ceding Roman period.
    "Reliqui veni vidi" as the Romans used to say.







  • Teddy.15

    lol this is so hilarious, eye opening imagery and as you always do it's genius.

  • Neil Higgins

    Many thanks my dear.When I read it to family members,they all looked at me as though I had lost the plot.And I have ha ha.
    As usual you are a star for reading my scribbling Teddy

  • Neville



    no friend of Fido by any chance .. maybe a relative ... paws, rewind and read again ...

    woz Mr. Hopeless a consowltant by any chance ..

    Ah' that's better .. just wot the doctor ordered ......... 🙂

  • Neil Higgins

    Thank you kindly.It was a howling tale from start to finish.
    Many thanks Neville

  • Fay Slimm.

    Love the re-hashing of titles as and with the Hound of the Baskervilles there are scary undertones to these sleuths too. A dark and devilish take until Scarlet Ways entered to scam a plan - ha ha - you have a way with Dickonsion prose Neil. Great fun read.

  • Neil Higgins

    Thank you Fay.
    Rehash is my new moto now.I will plough through history and see who else I can plagiarise.Er,I mean re work.
    As ever your thoughts are always valued.
    Now.Where's my history book 🤔

  • hotidris

    Neat poem about a bounder.

  • Doggerel Dave

    What a lot of old nonsense - very entertaining old nonsense, and if I were a sleuth, I'd be trying to sus out where it all came from... so maybe I could get in that groove........

  • Neil Higgins

    Elementary my dear Dave.
    The games...a foot...



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