Lament

God has gone away

And even the holiest saint won't pray

For me.

Jesus Christ has lost his patients.

Did well in school,

But only in the dead eyes of machines.

A thread of twine in a ribbon of lies,

A streak of polish on a shiny trophy

My best friend went away

Locked up in his world of lonesome.

The one who helped me find myself

Fell quiet and then disappeared.

Took a fragment of my heart,

Giving shape to what I so long feared.

A friendship consumed by bitter silence.

My sweet cat passed away.

The pain, the tears, the dreams won't fade,

Still haunted by your precious face.

With me since I was a child,

I never got to say goodbye.

Your departure split my heart in two

In solitude still, I long to hold you.

Suppressing only goes so far.

Every day the drink is tempting.

To be lulled into a death-like sleep

Bestowed upon me by the kiss of whiskey.

The world around distorts and fades

Falling away

My consciousness is slipping.

For hours be cradled in toxic bliss.

For hours did I really live?

Who can say?

Though I'd have spared myself some pain

And I guess that'd be enough to say I'm living.

The shadows have started to dissipate.

The clouds of thunder have started to dull.

Further yet I have to go,

Looking forward, I'm filled with hope.

So for now I sit inside my cage,

Near to me, the dark shall fade.

No more dreams

Finally free

Someday soon

No longer blue.