tema

14 Lines

When your wings are cut off
Ripped away with no remorse
My love for you
Adulation too
Will be used
To disembark
From any part
Of the past
Now away, you may cast
Under the stars
And under vast
A world I built for you
With these two broken hands
Offering a heart that has so long been cracked

Comments4

  • Doggerel Dave

    Sonnet - you sure?

    • tema

      i suppose not, i just looked it up and it seems that my memory of my teacher's sonnet description is off lol...this is embarrassing

      • Doggerel Dave

        Don't be embarrassed; everybody makes mistakes - even me (I forgot to take the garbage out one night in 1998)........ 😊 😊

      • orchidee

        Yep, sure is a sonnet - got 14 lines 🙂 Not that I'm a poetry expert. lol.

        • tema

          that's correct but it has to be more than just a specific number of lines, there has to be two contrasting characters, ideas etc. with a specific rhyming pattern among other things
          clearly i was confused there haha

        • orchidee

          Oops, one minute ago this was called 'A Sonnet'!

        • Teddy.15

          This was no where near a sonnet, but a good thought on the title change, and now it seems to fit very well nicely expressed emotion in here, I adore the subject of love and here it makes a good impact. Heart break always a great subject.

          • tema

            thank you very much, this is an older poem and i just thought the younger poet in me deserved a little spotlight for once



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