IF I LOST

If I lost my mother today,
My origin will be history,
I would have lost the only remaining trace of my existence,
My physics will be shuttered and left on autopilot,
Home will just be a painful geographical point in which I trace two rich mounds of the earth - my parents grave,
A place where untapped ideas, unconditional love, and maybe unachieved dreams lie.
The future will look bleak and I wouldn't hope much about it.
If my mother lost me today,
Her poor heart will have ached a tad too much,
Her voice will disappear for a few days just as it did when my Dad passed away,
I picture her staring at our grave and hot tears streaming down her cheeks,
She would have suffered a three generation grieving streak that I don't think she can recover from,
Having grieved her Dad, her husband and then her son,
Either way the consequence will be devastating.