I relished being hungry for leftover Thanksgiving pop slop gloppy grub

Hmm... on second thought

lemme join anorexic club

until rib cage protrudes taut and visible

doubling as drum to drub

synchronized within heart of darkness,

especially when electrocardiogram exhibits

absolute zero vital sign,

cardiac arrest translates

as cessation to lub dub,

hence yours truly

declared dead as doornail,

coroner report deems arrhythmia

directly linkedin to deliberate Machiavellian flub

courtesy the missus attempt to poison me

actually aborted cuz nanobots
loosed upon body gripped with rigor mortis,

a minor inconvenient truth

cuz odorless and tasteless deadly toxins

rendered me convalescing

from bout with death, an oxymoronic

former slenderman gourmand.

temporarily deceased

until said microscopic robots

avidly analogous to frenzied
figuratively hogtied pigs

buzzfeeding at a trough
creating porcine hubbub

invisible nanoids (0.1-10 micrometres)

accomplished programmed task

whereby fatal microbes they did scrub
away leaving me fit as a fiddle.

No matter she thoroughly, painstakingly

and lovingly didst strew

haphazardly she threw

leftovers together,

this blustery march like

November twenty six figuratively view

wing the remaining thirty plus days

of two thousand twenty one

thoroughly cooked in microwave until...

poor excuse for my meal appeared

with consistency of shoe leather.

Think the missus not afraid

of Virginia Woolf keen to experiment

treating me like the Gingerbread Hag would:

questionable resultant glop pantomimed

for my guessing pleasure

never figure out in bajillion years

as amateurish Marcel Marceau charade

performance courtesy the spouse,

an entrée she gave - yours truly

immediately sought to evade

me subsequently evincing

horrific puckered mealy mouth

as though I swallowed hand grenade

figurative exploding oral cavity

feeble futile gesticulation inveighed.

Thus, methinks himself wise

to don cooking apron

please do not ask why

trumpeting self as master chef boyardee

so move over wife and allow husband to try

his hand (using skill - let) me prepare Thai
and/or other Asian cuisine dish,

cuz when free to potschke

(To fuss or "mess around"

inefficiently and inexpertly), I haint shy

to blend (indiscriminately) ingredients

ofttimes yours truly barley able to ply

boiling water since significant other

does not give this garden variety

and generic, gimlet eyed

gourmandizing guilt free

Earth friendly gumption goaded guy.

Every so often yours truly

gets so hungry, he could eat a horse

(yours truly jest kidding hoof course)

truth be told, I only eat one meal per day

all day from son up to son down, me a force

tubby reckoned with,

who if he gives way to vice

event chew wooly experiences remorse.

Hum glad to share mine reasonably rhyming hook

twenty six letters linkedin amidst

various combinations, formations, permutations,...

allows, enables, and provides a look

into the mindscape of Matthew Scott Harris

doth show himself with steely dangling

nonsense with sense and sensibility he forsook.