Beauty for Ashes

Offended by words, offended by deeds,
offended by my own insecurities.
 
Always trying to please, but never succeeding.
Wanting to be accepted, but usually neglected.

The longing I feel cannot be described,
but it can be seen by all the tears I've cried.

Who has seen those tears, one may ask.
Oh, no one can see them behind my mask.

The thoughts of discontentment that seem to haunt me,
Feed my weary soul - as the deadly fruit did to Eve.

The pleasure of death is on my tongue,
as I wound the wounder for all their wrongs.

My heart is heavy, my mask has cracked.
Onlookers are gawking with their masks intact.

I am broken, my mask is gone.
And now what I desire is to run. 

Run far away! Run says my heart!
I want to run and make a new start.

But something is tugging on all these feelings.
The heart is deceitful above all things.

God's Holy Spirit is calling to me.
Beauty for ashes He says lovingly.

I am yours and you are Mine.
The life you seek is quite divine.

It can be achieved in this life if you seek it.
But never in the flesh, only in spirit.

So seek Me first and you will find,
that the wounds you feel are also Mine.

The spirit is willing but the flesh is weak.
God's Word says, blessed are the meek.

Meekness is not weakness, it is strength controlled. 
Obey My Word, and your joy will overflow.

Help my unbelief my heart cries.
I am tempted by all Satan's lies.

God says come find rest and trust in Me.
I once was blind but now I see.

My sight and strength seem to falter at times,
but only when I think my life is mine.

God's Word says, Bought with a price you have been.
Great peace have they that love Thy law, and nothing shall offend them.