Us?

I’ve seen this before

I’ve lived it

So many times.

It’s not deja vu

It’s history repeating itself.

I know the stages like I know the back of my hand.

 

You text, after ghosting me for weeks.

You say you miss me

You say you love me

You call me yours 

You call me beautiful 

You are perfect

 

And just like that ,all the therapy sessions I went to trying to forget you, flushed down the toilet!

I don’t even think twice

I just fall

So hard that I get a concussion

My spine breaks

I lose control

 

And it is in this moment that you leave again

You leave me!

With no goodbye 

No explanation

Nothing 

My heart goes through the stages of grief again

 

All I long for is an explanation from you

But because of the barrier of unsaid feelings between us

I don’t have the right to demand it

The right to be hurt

The right to be jealous 

The right to feel

 

Because at the end of the day, Officially ,I’m not yours

Your friends don't know about me

Mine neither 

I’m yours at night, during the day we are perfect strangers.

 

I wish I never met you

Fallen for you

And your inconsistency

But then, we can’t choose who we fall for, can we?

h.L.o