I'm Listening.

Paul Bell

Right, I’ve taken what you said on board, and I spoke to Lynn, and she’s definitely up for it.
Okay love. Up for what, why does she talk to me when I’m watching the football. Who the hell is Lynn. Okay, fumble along and find out what the hell she’s talking about.
I mean, you would never have guessed Alan and Lynn were that way inclined.
Alan and Lynn, that’s the boring bastards who garden all day. He does flowers, she does vegetables. Rebels without a cos. What the hell would we be doing with them.
So we’ve booked the hotel for this Friday.
Christ, she’s booked a garden convention, a weekend away with plant pots. What the hell is wrong with that woman.
Lynn says they do it all time, she says we’ll love it.
That’s great love, can’t wait. Okay, I’ll need to fake a heart attack, the thought of a weekend with Bill and Ben is just too much to take.
I’ve told Lynn you like black underwear and stockings. She says that’s great, she loves dressing up.
Fuck sakes, they’re swingers, the boring bastards are swingers. I know I said our love life was boring, but for Christsakes not Bill and Ben.  How the hell do I get out of this.
Lynn says Alan loves nurses, so I’ve bought a nurse's uniform.
Listen, love, I don’t want Alan to see you in a nurse's uniform. I love you too much to share you with another guy.
You really haven’t got a clue.
What.
What did I say to you earlier?
You said you spoke to Lynn.
No, I didn’t, I said my mum was coming to stay for the week.
We’re definitely not going swinging with Bill and Ben.
Do I look like I do swinging, this is what I keep nagging you about, you don’t listen to a word I say?
Right, I think I’ve learned my lesson, when’s your mum coming.
This Friday.
That’s great, look forward to it. The mother in law, or the vegetable woman in stockings. Choices, choices.

  • Author: Paul Bell (Pseudonym) (Offline Offline)
  • Published: January 4th, 2022 06:00
  • Category: Humor
  • Views: 24
Get a free collection of Classic Poetry ↓

Receive the ebook in seconds 50 poems from 50 different authors


Comments +

Comments2

  • L. B. Mek

    if you ever get a chance
    watch the film called
    'His Girl Friday'
    1940 with Carry Grant
    then try to find a sample of the script
    and finally compare it to your write...
    I genuinely think, your writing has the potential to be that good
    especially your sharp dialogues..
    but anyway, what do I know?
    just saying I like your style, dear Poet
    and Happy New Year!

    • Paul Bell

      Happy new year, L.B. I'll check it out, though they were a bit special back then.

    • Rozina

      Hahaha! So enjoyable to read and laugh!

      • Paul Bell

        You need a laugh in January.



      To be able to comment and rate this poem, you must be registered. Register here or if you are already registered, login here.