Gangly Longfellow walled in Thoreau and thru...

Well stocked with
wordsworth lxiii numbered yesteryear
born as predicted by
bubba's zayda longtime seer

while in utero premier
ultrasound detected
smudged embryonic fetus

whoosh auditory proto language unclear
surprisingly enough sounded analogous
to murmuring... huh yepper sonneteer

vaguely resembling, yes

William Shakespeare

though burbling, gurgling,

requiring absolute zero noise to hear
kickstarting, reverently warbling
difficult, diligent, distinct yawping,
nonetheless reckoned as dérailleur,

viz swiftly tailored
inchoate anatomical gear
hurriedly styled pièce de résistance

yours truly born with silver dictionary
in his mouth, I f***'* swear

 

unusual biological phenomena
drew pediatricians far and near,

which (no surprise) determined
English major as academic career

matriculating upon immediately
exiting birth canal whip smart derriere

i.e. (ŧ§), spread like wildfire, where
media hounds blitzkrieg stunned to stare

not at me but bare

naked lady in no mood...ready to tear

away sophisticated audiovisual equipment

 

understandably on verge going nuclear

furious, (this told me later in life as here

say), she quickly (albeit groggy)
curtly demanded fair
remuneration, and milked
infant me as cash cow profiteer,

her eyes aglitter signaling,
shining, seeing... gold

let whoever sneer
earning money with initial gasp of air
freeing parents to live

within lap of luxury
world wide web sightseer,

yours truly received
royal carpet treatment everywhere

crisscrossing the globe

accoutered with most
expensive designer babywear

obliviously prattling, jabbering, gabbling...

invariably drawing throngs
across entire northern hemisphere

broadcast as podcast across atmosphere

all across the universe hoodwinking

convincing many of "FAKE" poetic story
concoction courtesy adept fictioneer.