Sneezing fit – tests non deviated septum

An infinitesimal slight speck

tickled nostril follicle – activated
via an itty bitty, nitty gritty dirt band

noah bigger than a mole
luck yule set in motion

a chain reaction,

whence mine sensitive
proboscis honker (a wheeze hilly

little bridged fine tuned pug
nose aroma sensor),

got unexpectedly in gauged

(in holy matt

trim mo’ knee) to achew,

and eschew pledging troth (in favor
of hanky-panky) found

this chap feeling phlegmatic despite
an endless strings of faux

allergic emanations, which upon
subsiding left me throat

rather raspy and voice some octaves
deeper akin to a coterie

of celebrated jumping frogs from
Calaveras County, California

took residence and took leave
sans stranglehold upon

math rote upon awakening

from a hard day’s journey into night

across the outer limits of thine
twilight zone resurrected

during slumber, yet upon awake
kin ning felt much refreshed

and hungry enough to eat a horse
– nee – make that forced whore –

gulped down within a hoof

n hour and now recount how

back in the day when zooming
thru the Lilies of the Valley

(whooshing mass elf tubby an aero
plane) frequent bouts

with uber twittering snapchatting sinus
attacks besieged crinkled,

doppelganger expeller for germs
hunting with his clean

X instantaneously for nasal passages
to enter surreptitiously

the fecund effluvia dripping, oozing,

and seeping clear liquid

as wintry cold air looses droplets
from out a near frozen nose,

which bloke knows not why
frigid blast stimulates

a gallimaufry of sniffling to spurt into
a volume of one after another

gesundheit snorting trumpeting
unwittingly confusing

Canadian geese, who misconstrue the

honking from midway

centered facial organ, which angry
birds in tandem with

flock of Seagulls quite perturbed to
espy one curmudgeon chap

clapping hands over (what feels
like a smashed face)

in an effort to stifle subsequent gummy
emissions, which residue

expectorated with heaven hoe.

This thick mucous

essentially the defense mechanism of
a healthy body electric

to restore biz zee nose as usual,
which for this mild mannered

liberal leitmotif from the
chronicle of one matted

nattering nabob of nativity attests

congested mob functioning

like a well lubricated machine,
et for the life of me,

nary a handy dandy

blues clues evident

as per, how the human entity

empowered to steamroll over
any reasonably annoying bugaboo.

Ah, now if only a similar
innate defense mechanism

arose within the mental health,
that would be a supreme testament

to thine atheistic exist
ants of miracles minus

the attendant pharmacopeia of this,
that or some other drug

to aright skewered psyche (of this
contemplative, emotive

and intuitive literate outlier),

whose sixty plus three

shades of gray matter went awry
and skewed toward tipping point

(to cope with ordinary
cares and concerns

of an uncertain whirled wide web)
found the bulk of his life

riddled with a joe king, gun
slinging tub back ha chew win,

bard arse wordsmith,
who doth newt like

to utter any crossword.