Journey

and do you remember -?

i’m sure you do, in

the darkest dregs

of your mind, beyond

the tunnels of shifting grays

direct your gaze away from

the lines across the train platform

if you stare at them too long,

they become blurry, and you’ll forget

what it’s like to be human

 

watch your step- don’t you know that

if you’re not careful, you could

step on a land mine and unearth

a memory your mind has been merciful enough

to let you forget

keep your hand clasped into mine

so tightly you forget what it is like

to be two different entities in space

and we exist for a moment infinitely

in the only way we know, in the only way we will

 

definitely forget later, how tragic it is

my golden moments spill through my fingers

those glittering grains of sand, coarse

against my aged hands, but no bother

follow me close, don’t miss that next turn

the turn is important, this is a one-way street

don’t look back, we’ve come too far

to back down, to apologize

for daring to break the mold carved into

the mess of the walls on the inside of your shell

and when the water becomes distorted

and you feel like you’re made of smoke

keep your eyes forward through the waving white

force them open and focus on my clammy hand

try not to breathe, the air is toxic here

don’t apologize- we’ve all had our dark moments

when the tale they call time

becomes too hard for one to carry

it is a heavy burden to shoulder alone

 

but you cannot give up, we are almost there

these are the hours that matter, these are the footsteps

and the echoes they will write of one day

but first you must survive and tell the tale

the only way is forward, burn that thought

into the back of your head,

do you see the oak doors up ahead

even if you don’t you must pretend

and convince yourself, and then it will be there

believe me if you cannot believe in yourself

watch the roots, they sprawl

across this otherwise barren landscape

this is the palace of broken dreams, this is the

ruins of smoky ghosts and the hall of fractured mirrors

eyes forward, you must keep them forward, or else

you could get lost in between the sheets

of glaring, taunting stares of the different versions

of yourself, hold my hand tight now,

the door is in front of you, isn’t the door knob smooth

in your hand, it caresses your skin

like a metal promise, and for a moment

 

doesn’t it feel like the invisible knob on the imaginary door frame

from one of your childhood games, i am

letting go of your hand now, i am going now, look,

the doors is opening, and between the two planks

of ancient scripture, the past spills out:

a torrent of tears and grief, and as waves crash

upon your vulnerable head, squint your eyes against the foam

 

eyes forward, grip onto my hand, and if you cannot feel it

if you cannot feel my presence or see my faded form

you must pretend i am still there, eyes forward

you cannot afford to look for me, i do not matter

in the grand scheme of things, isn’t it beautiful

how as the waters ebb light spills in

as the different colors float across this flooded dreamland

it knocks the distorted mirrors away, but even so

you must be careful not to step on the shards

on your way back, and not to trip on the roots

as you walk along the twists and turns

 

with the vision of a paradise now extinct

captured like a bird in the cage of your thoughts

don’t forget to make the turn

on the way back to the train station

and if you let your eyes linger

on the fuzzy lines try not to wonder

what the lines are made of

if you do, you might forget

what it is like to love.