Mine slovenly unkempt appearance spelled embarrassment

spurred by most recent therapy session

with Renee Cardone

whereby thematic thread

stitched how yours truly sewed

coping modus operandi,

viz avoiding emotionally volatile situations

courtesy mine trademark signature reactions

rather than be in compliance with expectations.

 

Said nonconformist passive rebelliousness

especially affected our eldest daughter

me and the missus begot

even when she became potential human,
which zygote quickly multiplied and divided,
and upon first blush

if blot of amalgamated undifferentiated cells
shown to botanist visible to the naked eye,

he/she would understandably, possibly,

and easily misconstrue specimen as ergot

housed whip smart Rorschach inkblot
sized being who expressed disdain NOT

be linkedin with me, her disheveled papa,
who underwent extensive cosmetic surgery

and rigorous physical training

to become taikonaut.

No rhyme nor reason why

yours truly recalled how

me very late (long deceased) mother

(earlier in her fitbit livingsocial years)

non verbally communicated disgust

(nsync with audible sigh)

quite often ultimatums

blasting fulminating nauseating

scathing well nigh

she loosed loathing against

grungy looking son (guess who)

 

futilely escaped wrath of Harriet Khan

clamoring upon rooftop high

offering birds eye view

out of earshot and eyesight aye

catching sunbeams while smiling wry

cowardly lion sought divine intervention

courtesy sheltering sky

acres of shingles I sprawled

these lovely bones did lie

property of garden variety generic guy.

 

She who helped beget and birth

sole heir inheriting gamut of behavioral quirks

linkedin with many predecessors,

who trod, slunk, roamed...

across planet Earth.

 

Best bet said present day scribe i.e.

poetic, nonesstablishmentarian, liberal,

jesting, humble, freelance, dilatory bummer

whose hindsight evinced a student dumber

than his classmates wheedled

(as targeted scapegoat) by bullies their flummer

re: entrapped - worse louse than lice

internalized trauma left figurative tread marks

analogous to raging road runner

pressing accelerator pedal of hummer

driven by (an actual person)

one Roger Kummerer,
jogged me memory to recollect
if yours truly not mistaken
his older sibling Marsha
gave a preemie kitten to Amélie
mine eldest sister,
(whom she named Twinkles)
scores of decades in the past,
when our family lived on Lantern Lane.

 

Despite agonizing vicious tongue lashing

courtesy parents against their flesh and blood,

which venomous invisible whiplash

never petered out against

peckerhead son of a gun

(even when sundry bloke

got married and gladly left home)

abusive treatment markedly

left appalling, loathing and percolating

ambivalence if though mama passed away

(these last eighteen plus years) wrung

cash crop of poetic endeavors,

albeit resultant lackluster

literary crafted aspirations

many describing marginal existence.

 

Memory of mom overshadowed

by similar facsimile thereof

think shrieking banshee,

an indelible psychological imprimatur,
I strive to acknowledge
emotional reverberations to date
(June eighth, 2022).

 

My trademark wordsmith fashioned communiqué

impossible mission to shake off bittersweet feelings
toward once (former)

Arthur Murray dance instructor,
which fancy footwork synchronized with favorite

debonair handsome young fella (papa)

both flirts buoyant with elan and energy

only thru death will angst become free

interestingly enough hands will clap with glee,
cuz versatile wordsmith he
meaning this logophile will cease knee
dulling anonymous readers now me (Phil)
Anders heads off into the virtual blue beyond.