THE LOVE I HAD FOR YOU WAS REAL

I want to pick up my phone and write to you how I feel. Let you know the rage that burns in my heart and the fear installed in my mind. List all the pain you've left behind. But there is no point because I know you don't really care. How could you? when you're not even here. 

you've probably found your next Target and have a whole plotted plan, to ruin the next the way you did me. Just because you can. only it'd be different because the love I had for you is real. 

I can still feel, the warmth I had in my chest just from being around you. Your laugh, your smile, Replaying in my head like a broken re-cord. I can actually feel the break in my heart, and my eyes have poured. 

You had me fooled, I really thought you cared for me. SHAME ON ME! You showed me who you were. I just failed to believe it. chose to love you even with your exposed secret.

I was stupid to let you back in. But my love for you was so strong that my knees were weakened.

I couldn't stand without you. My body thirsts for you. you were like the fresh drink of water after dying in the heat all day. 

In my bed suffocating I'd lay.

Feeling like I needed you to survive. Surprised at the fact im still alive. Congratulations! you've succeeded. Became everything i thought i needed.

you took my soul with you when you left that day. I wanted to cry and beg for you to stay.

But for what? You had already used me for everything I had to offer. swept my life right from under my feet. Teach me! Because your trick was neat. Now that I have nothing, and I am nothing, you probably feel as if you won. now I feel stupid knowing that you really never thought i was your one.

I have no idea what or who I was to you. but you were everything to me. your loyalty never lied with me it lied with she.

The one who didn't care for you. You were just another option for her. but lucky you! There's a baby on the way. A life that y'all created together. I'm glad you got what you really wanted. congratulations on your seed. I hope you never have to plead.

Now forever, you'll be,

tied to someone who never gave a f*** about you. have grandkids together everything I fantasized with you.

you have it with her. I hope you smile, hope you laugh, and I hope you enjoy the path. that you chose,  you tried to drag me down with you. but why? Im glad that door closed. Why not let me go?

You knew you were no good for me. You knew your love wasn't real.

You played with me anyway. pretended like you wanted to stay. 

Or did you stay because you realize she wasn't all it made out to be? You realized she wasn't me.

There were no laughs, no smiles, she never made you feel like a king.

Didnt care to cook or clean. 

She played you the way you played me  and you fell for it too. I hope all your skies are blue, and there are no rainy days for you.

but never get too excited because, karma is coming through. You'll pay for what you did to me, my kids, and my mother too.

you were a monster. I only wish that you weren't. You'll bring pain to anyone that's current.

I'm glad I've been cut free. you have no ties to me. no marriage, we could never be. for this is the 4th time that you've flee. please don't come back to me. One day you'll wake up and realize what I tried to be. you'll always remember me, and you'll see how you've made my life a thrill. You'll hate yourself. 

Because the love I had for you was real.