Recurrent sneezing fit courtesy freshly mowed grass

circa June 20^th, 2022

prompted me to stutter

self addressed rapid fire gesundheit

nsync with, spluttering

“I don't have any allergies!”

An infinitesimal slight speck tickled

nostril follicle – activated via an itty

bitty, nitty gritty dirt band noah bigger

than a mole luck yule set in motion a

chain reaction, whence mine sensitive
proboscis honker (wheeze - hilly little

bridged fine tuned pug nose aroma

sensor), got unexpectedly in gauged

(in holy matt trim mo’ knee) to achew,

and eschew pledging troth (in favor of

hanky-panky) found this chap feeling

phlegmatic because an endless string

of faux allergic emanations, which

upon subsiding left me throat rather

raspy and voice some octaves deeper

akin to a coterie of celebrated jumping

frogs from Calaveras County, California

took residence and refused leaving

stranglehold upon math rote upon

awakening from a hard day’s journey

into night across the outer limits

of thine twilight zone resurrected

during slumber, yet upon awakening

felt much refreshed and hungry enough

to eat a horse – nee – make that forced

whore – gulped down within a hoof

n hour and now recount how back in

the day when zooming thru the Lilies

of the Valley (whooshing mass elf tubby

an aeroplane) frequent bouts with uber

twittering snapchatting sinus attacks

besieged crinkled, doppelganger expeller

for germs hunting with his clean X

instantaneously for nasal passages

to enter surreptitiously the fecund

effluvia dripping, oozing, and seeping

clear liquid as wintry cold air looses

droplets from out a near frozen nose,

which bloke knows not why frigid blast

stimulates gallimaufry of sniffling

to spurt into a volume of one after

another gesundheit donning, snorting

trumpeting unwittingly confusing

Canadian geese, who misconstrue

the honking from midway centered

facial organ, which angry birds

in tandem with flock of Seagulls

quite perturbed to espy one curmudgeon

chap clapping hands over (what feels

like Smashing Pumpkins on face -

resembling a Puddle of Mudd)

in an effort to stifle subsequent gummy
emissions, which residue expectorated

with heave hoe shove
schnoz el tov blowing into snot-rag.

This thick mucous essentially

the defense mechanism of a healthy

body electric to restore biz zee nose

as usual, which for this mild mannered

liberal leitmotif from the chronicle of one

matted nattering nabob of nativity attests
congested mob functioning like

a well lubricated machine, yet

for the life of me, nary a handy dandy

blues clues evident as per, how

the human entity empowered

to steamroll over
any reasonably annoying bugaboo.

Ah, now if only a similar innate

defense mechanism arose

within the mental health,

that would be a supreme testament

to thine atheistic tasty mints of miracles

minus the attendant pharmacopeia

of this, that or some other drug to aright

skewered psyche (of this contemplative,

emotive and intuitive literate outlier),

whose sixty three plus eight shades

of gray matter went awry and skewed

toward tipping point (to cope with ordinary

cares and concerns of an uncertain

whirled wide web) found the bulk

of his life riddled with a joe king,

gun slinging tub back ha chew win,

bard arse wordsmith,

who doth newt like to utter any

cryptographic crossword

toward friend or foe.