immeasurable certainty

immeasurable certainty

Emerging from shutdown
Total separation from stimuli
hunger is a primal chore enjoyed only in base satisfaction
music offers no joy

accidental brushing of guitar
strings swiftly muted
aroma does not constitute therapy
hide  ignore  reflect endless
stare into a rear view mirror
of the past
reflecting endlessly

familial love bears a self styled barb of return to normal
do I have a right to burden?
chastise myself again
friendly help is welcomed 
but declined please try
once more
the value of love is precious
and informal

absorbed in isolation
revolving thoughts of
life undone
smiling non existent
emotionless face that
harbours all the past
even bathing is
no fun

a path ahead appears
(suddenly a glimpse of
forward movement)
in money
the confirmation that
this was the cause of
failure
failure to provide
to answer to love
to answer the call
of love
such simplicity

Emerging from SHUTDOWN
The locked gate now swings
open
The future beckons with possibility of life which could be better and joyful
Can I listen to a song?
May I prepare a meal
of perhaps Soba or Udon?

In restoring my talents
I trip into a chance
A possible Volition
Nuture of Ability
My soul has found
A Voice
Forging of New Experience 
return to measured certainty
of employ in another person's
choice
Or immeasurable uncertainty
In commitment to self-worth
But some all they see is a sponge
A blemish of Humanity

I seek Immeasurable Certainty
in self employ