little baby duck

i am like a little baby duck
swimming behind her mother
on a big lake
never leaving her side
cause of the fear
because what if i do something 
and disappear? 

My mother knows better
My mother will teach me
My mother will take care of me
My mother will protect me
But my mother also caves me in
through the traces she leaves
when she swims in front of me. 

Unable to leave
Frightend to swim further then she teached me
I watch the other baby ducks from afar
They are chasing each other
smiles on their faces
they are laughing out loud
having the time of their lifes
and then they see me
They look at each other 
As i look away
out of embarassment
because i realised
they are on their own
and grown

suddenly
they call me over 
"come over here, 
it's so much fun. 
You are missing out! " 
My heart stings
My body longs in desperation
My mind full of imaginations
I want to go to them so badly
but then my mother snaps me out of it
calling me over 
because i had stopped swimming

i look around
eyes filled with panic 
when i noticed
her traces are gone
and that's when i realized 
i left the cave
and i am okay

~022