3 Weeks

the doctor says I have about 3 weeks to live.

I wonder if I should spend my last 3 weeks praying or leaving my last kisses on her body.

I wonder if there truly is a god, a god as real as the butterflies I feel when her fingertips touch my skin, or a god as real as the purple love bites left on her inner thighs.

perhaps when my last 3 weeks are over I get to watch her from the heavens, make sure someone loves her the way I did.

or perhaps when my 3 weeks are over id get to see if jesus really does have holes in his palms.

but when my 3 weeks are over, I know id be in a safer place, but still not safer than her arms.