Plagued by Insignificance

it is unbearable,

the mental anguish, the physical torment,

why does my body forget to function,

when my stomach twists into a noose,

strangling my lungs,

hindering my ability to breath,

the pain reaching the depths of my mind,

pulsating in the crown of my head,

hiding my brain in the clouds,

covered in fumes,

i can’t think,

i can’t breathe

 

the stuttering of my mouth,

transfers to my fingers,

think, think, think,

of how to phrase,

of how to deal,

with this frightening talk,

a simple request brings so much discomfort,

the cold sweat forming,

hands trembling in silent suffering,

a simple hello,

making me paralysed

 

what makes it so difficult,

to form words,

to ask,

to face my worries,

instead of running away,

from my baseless fears,

confronting my anguish,

head on with a startling resolve,

i wish i could,

but it hurts,

my heart is still restrained,

my breath is still short,

regardless of my efforts,

i am maimed.