Firefly

“In my darkest hour,”  they say 

But this is rarely true

Dark hours ebb and flow

The human condition

With a furrowed brow I went outside 

I want my mother but she is dead 

This ache

I want my mother but she is dead 

This disquiet 

I want my mother but she is dead 

I thought it like a mantra

Fuck this

A dragonfly flitted amongst the fall leaves 

Daring to be beautiful in my darkness

Fuck off, I said

He did something so weird then

He came and took a rest on my shirt sleeve

I saw his little face 

Hot tears on my fevered cheeks

Something lifted inside me

I’m so sorry 

I’m so sorry 

I’m so sorry

I whispered like a mantra 

To the face of the dragonfly

Thank you for holding beauty in my darkness 

And I was talking to both of us