I'm sorry, but I'm proud

To my "strangers";

I'm sorry, I can't seem to do anything right

Lonely in a crowded room again tonight 

Is there even a reason why I'm here?

Well i guess I wouldn't mind to disappear

Don't think that i can be what you want

I have always been a nuisance after all

To the doctors;

I'm sorry, i don't really care about the scars

And as for the pills i think I'm gonna pass

Everything is blurry anyway

And my head's already messy everyday

I don't think i will get to explain

I am boring when i say that I'm in pain 

To the phycologist;

I'm sorry, there is nothing left for me to do

I'm not special, so many patients in this room

And you don't know what it's like in my mind 

What my "tough" looks like you don't get to decide 

But I'm tired of pretending I'm okay 

No more hiding, go ahead and ask away 

To that wannabe friend;

I'm sorry, did i fail your expectations once again? 

Either way i didn't need a brand new friend 

I'm more than content with what i have 

But, in this new town, I'm running out of luck

People here have a repulsive touch 

No one told me that "a future" costs this much 

To the "mean girls";

I'm sorry, is it hard for you to hear my words? 

I'm not surprised, we're living in two different worlds 

You know my name but not what I've been through

And I don't criticize strangers, unlike you 

My mind is dry like blood upon the floors 

But the only sickness that i see is in yours

To all of them;

I'm sorry for not speaking this loudly before

For not caring about your words anymore 

There is nothing left, everything's shared 

So in the memory of when i used to care;

"I'm sorry"

But now I'm loud

And for that I'm proud 🦋