The Cognitive Infernal

everyday i feel the heat of  sadness rise to the tip top of my head. almost as if timed by my creator. like a forest fire my hair begins to be engulfed by the rage of emotion. a blaze so hot and so intense all I can feel is the quivering headache the aftershock of the blaze leaves. it leaves me with nothing but the empty valleys of lost potential and intrusive thoughts, that crowd my brain like a gas chamber full of people. crowded with misery and the fact that death is near.  a sweet release or just agony accompanied by a black and never ending terminal wall of loneliness. my pain is like a flower so delicate yet so deep. my fragility angers me. it makes me weak. so i’m forced to put up walls so high and so mighty that only my fleeting sanity will be able to break. like a princess locked in a tower. my petals are soft and supple but my stem is strong and resilient. even after being plucked from this mortal coil to join the bouquet of the broken, i will nourish my petals with the wave of knowledge pain brings. a forced maturity. the childhood of the beaten and the dammed is the fertilizer to the cosmic garden of love and nourish