I cannot fix you,
Or all you've been through.
What he did or didn't do,
I've processed, I didn't choose,
As didn't you.
The line was drawn for me,
By my own hand, I scored it.
What has passed will be,
I've moved on, I ensured it.
You're rooted in past issues,
Clinging to memories of abuse.
If I go back with you,
I'll sacrifice my future too.
The Sun has risen,
Then its fallen, many times.
Our wounds have been patched,
At least have my brothers, and mine.
The tears have dried,
We've re-learned, how to trust.
Memories unforgotten.
We've just learned to adjust.
We were told far too much,
Too young to understand.
If you couldn't figure it out,
What chance did we stand?
I have to look forward,
I have kids of my own.
I wasn't always shown love,
But that is all they will know.
-
Author:
G (Pseudonym) (
Offline) - Published: January 9th, 2023 13:12
- Comment from author about the poem: Childhood wasn't great, a drunk parent had an episode the other day at a family party - this poem is a result of that night
- Category: Unclassified
- Views: 16
Offline)
Comments2
I can't imagine what you must have gone through. But i think you found the right words to describe the pain, regret and worry.
I hope it gets better
thanks for the comment purpleglasses, this was simply a rant off the back of an incident, my life is amazing now it just took some years of darkness to sort through memories and forgiveness etc. 🙂
My dad would also get drunk and it was terrifying coming home to him from school. I would sneak up to my room while he had a drink in hand and the TV blaring loudly in his cold face… And this poem just really hit something deep.
I would have been comprehensive/high school age when all of this kicked off originally, im pushing 40 now and lifes great. It took me a long long time to be able to function without issues, i struggled to trust anyone especially romantically, my fix was to realise that i cant control the events of my life but i can control how i react to them and that to trust had to be a conscious choice of mine it wasn't something i must give by proxy, It was difficult to believe people weren't just going to up and leave one day when i needed them, then i realised i was dependant on the way others treated my to evaluate my self worth, and i couldn't have been more wrong 🙂 i hope you find your peace if you haven't already if i had allowed myself to succumb to the negative events in my life that i didn't ask for, i would of became the very person/people that dragged me through these situations and that is something i would never do to my children! Don't become an alcohol dependant shell of a person!
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