Can\\\'t sleep

Joseph M Marion

As the night draws near winds blowing, things knocking and things falling on the roof, the least of my problems,  sleeping is the one thing I fear,
To lay my head in a bed knowing that the nightmares and sadness will soon be there,
I can't sleep at night I have a hard time, I have for more than 20 years,
Things from my past the horrible memories that seem always last, they never go away no matter what I try to do or even say,
The convictions that I have to live with the black hole that it left inside that never goes away and eats at my insides and never hides,
I exhaust myself waking up soaking wet from sweat,
Running from, and to ,looking down range more than I should, more than I wanted to,
They say these things must happen but I believe there are some things that should never happen but they just do, man's good at that plan,
But this is the price some pay for the world we live in today,
I'm getting tired of crying out into the night and getting tired of screaming out of fright,
They say we're all put here for a purpose but mine seems to be undefined,
I can't figure out why the Lord would do this it almost seems as if he's turned his cheek,
And by the morning I'm more tired than when I started,
Feeling more than just broken hearted, I Fall to my knees, with tears in my eyes I pray beg the Lord please is all I can do to make it through one more day.

  • Author: Joseph M Marion (Pseudonym) (Offline Offline)
  • Published: January 26th, 2023 18:04
  • Category: Reflection
  • Views:

Comments3

  • M. C. Vollmann

    🙁 very intriguing poetry, "Joseph". > 🙁

    • Joseph M Marion

      Thank you but it comes from the truth of what really happens to me

      • M. C. Vollmann

        https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IJtHdkyo0hc

        I\'m sorry. _Scarface - At night I can\\\'t sleep, I toss and turn
        Candlesticks in the dark, visions of bodies being burned
        Four walls just staring at a nigga
        I\\\'m paranoid, sleeping with my finger on the trigger
        My mother\\\'s always stressing I ain\\\'t living right
        But I ain\\\'t going out without a fight
        See, every time my eyes close
        I start sweatin\\\', and blood starts comin\\\' out my nose
        It\\\'s somebody watchin\\\' the ak\\\'
        But I don\\\'t know who it is, so I\\\'m watching my back
        I can see him when I\\\'m deep in the covers
        When I awake I don\\\'t see the motherfucker
        He owns a black hat like I own
        A black suit and a cane like my own
        Some might say \\\"take a chill, b\\\"
        But fuck that shit, there\\\'s a nigga trying to kill me Ghetto Boys - Mind Playing Tricks On Me.

        • 1 more comment

      • Christina8

        Sounds like the horrors of PTSD, I have that too....probably why I'm awake too...Hope you feel better! Christina

        • Joseph M Marion

          Thank you yes I have it bad was 91b but moved to m11 worked up.to m19

        • L. B. Mek

          'And by the morning I'm more tired than when I started'
          this is worded so relatable
          I hope you find a solution
          till then, remember
          go easy on yourself
          try to imagine
          each and every
          regret, event or happening
          you experience
          as one instance, of life
          in and of itself
          do not let them pile up
          till, they become unmovable blockades
          in your mind..
          go easy on yourself, try to imagine
          someone, somewhere
          has experienced something similar
          and survived...
          stay strong! dear poet
          thanks for sharing



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