a plastic flower

georgiaa

 

a plastic flower 

i’m sick of waiting for something special something with half as much care and attention as i give everyone

i can’t

i can’t beg anymore for the small things

for surprises and flowers and hugs

i want

i want a card i want some effort i want a flower you picked up on the way here i want surprises and for you to care for me the way i do

i want too much

i want to be loved the way i love

instead

i get blamed for reacting to the way they make me feel

for not wanting to speak to them when i’m mad but when i tried to i always ended up at fault

i’m crazy i’m rude i’m overreacting

        i always overreact

i never listen i always blame i don’t try enough i don’t love enough i don’t show my love right i’m closed off

         i’m so uptight

but when i try to talk i choke or i’m silenced

i give my heart and soul and i’m left empty with a plastic flower

a plastic flower i hate almost as much as “myself”

the self i made up out of broken i’ll be theres and promises and i don’t know what to get yous empty expectations of maybe they’ll be there and the false hopes that the little white little envelopes of wishes for wellness won’t have a hidden oh god why is it your birthday again

 

 

 

 

 

                           

  • Author: georgiaa (Offline Offline)
  • Published: February 16th, 2023 18:43
  • Category: Sad
  • Views: 31
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Comments +

Comments4

  • Doggerel Dave

    Sad alright - please move on....

  • Thorn3

    This is beautiful…

  • MiddleMood

    So sadly relatable

  • L. B. Mek

    (we can't control others
    be it their actions or their intensions
    we can only make those choices
    that free us
    of regret and minimise our suffering..
    like for one, only offer to others
    a part of ourselves
    we can share without expecting
    anything in return
    that way, we
    remain in control
    whether our feelings and actions
    are reciprocated
    won't affect us, as much)
    thanks for sharing
    please, forgive me if my words come across as toxic
    stay strong!



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