The Estranged Mothers Embrace

In the lonely embrace of emptiness

I find myself once again unable to appetite

as I stare at the cold, forgotten dinner before me.

 

My thoughts are consumed by my mother, the woman who brought me into this world

the woman who should have loved and cared for me

But instead, she has become a distant stranger

twisting my stomach into knots

 

I try to force myself not to care

not to want a mother's warm embrace

her kind words of unconditional love in this lost and confusing world

But how can I want that from the woman who shattered me, piece by piece, until nothing was left?

 

So I just stare at a cement wall

empty and lost in my own thoughts

fantasizing that my mother will magically appear

to scoop me up in her arms, never letting me go

giving me the reassurance I've always craved

 

But the cold hard truth is that it will never happen

that warm embrace, those kind words

 

I'm too exhausted to cry

 

left alone with my thoughts and memories of what should have been

How am I supposed to be okay, with the fact that my own mother is a stranger, nothing more than a distant memory?

The emptiness consumes me, and I am left feeling lost and alone

trying to find my way in a world without the love and care

that should have been given to me.