Parasites

I am too heavy

Too dull

Too stupid

And too gray to be who I wish to be

I have too many bruises, too many cuts

They all hurt to touch

Drowned in pity and wrapped in gauze

So much, it’s all I think about

I could have been so much

Touched so many

Loved even more

But I can only lick my wounds

And wash them in tears

The few that I have

Wrung from a sponge, they fall

Eaten and dysfunctional

Host to parasites who won’t leave

Knotting, spindly worms

Infesting the wounds in my arms

Marionetting my hands

Shutting my mouth

Glazing my eyes

Smoothing my brain 

Eating who I was

Who I wish to be

I am now puppet

Bound to strings of words long said

Your words drowning mine

Inside me, your searing brand

I think in the words you speak

And in the sentences you’ve said

And remember what you have(n’t) done

I hate how you have infected me

Diseased my thoughts

A spiritual leprosy and mental chains of iron

I’d tell you this, scream even, but there are worms in my tongue

And wrapped around my lips

Cheap factory meat is all I am now

Served in plastic

With a side of potatoes

Sitting at your table

With my parasites